School can be both exciting and overwhelming for children—filled with challenges, new social situations, and opportunities to learn. Kids who feel intimidated by all of that activity can sometimes shut—they don’t participate in class or spend time by themselves on the playground.
As parents and caregivers, helping kids build confidence in this environment is one of the most valuable gifts we can give them. Confidence doesn’t just make school more enjoyable; it empowers children to take risks, express themselves, and believe in their abilities.
Here are five simple but powerful ways to help your child feel more self-assured and capable in the classroom and beyond.
1. Have Them Keep a Gratitude Journal
Even if your child’s schedule is packed with activities, it only takes five minutes to encourage them to write down what they’re grateful for. A gratitude and kindness journal, such as The Five Minute Journal for Kids or Say It, Show It (written by a 9-year-old!), can inspire thoughtful reflection about the people, moments and actions that have a big impact in your child’s life, and motivate them to do kind things for others. A positive mindset can set the tone for a school year where your kids feel empowered, instead of weighed down by self-doubt.
2. Praise Confident Moments and Encourage New Ones
Every parent knows that there’s no handbook for raising a confident child. But improving your child’s outlook on life is as easy as looking for everyday moments of quiet confidence, while adding activities outside their comfort zone to encourage growth. For example, keep an eye out for moments of bravery, whether it’s asking another child for a turn on the swing set to helping one up after a fall on the soccer field. Similarly, modeling confident behavior as a parent can encourage independence and self-confidence.
3. Teach Them That Failure Is OK
Being “good” at failure is an important way that children learn to trust their skills and abilities. You can encourage a growth mindset in your kids by helping them to persist during periods of hardship, praise others when they succeed, and remind them not to take criticism personally. Small moments of recognizing their efforts—whether it’s the result of a test you know they studied for, or a strong game you know they trained hard for—can mean they start embracing challenges instead of running from them.
4. Encourage A Healthy Lifestyle
From the breakfast they eat before leaving for school to their bedtime the night before, nutrition and sleep have a big impact on your child’s attitude and performance at school. Studies have shown that 80% of American teenagers don’t get 8 to 10 hours of sleep each night, which can lead to poor attendance and reduced mental health. A tech-free bedtime routine—as well as outdoor exercise and a healthy breakfast—can keep your kids in a positive frame of mind throughout the year.
5. Give Specific Praise—Beyond When They’ve Earned It
Parents praise their kids after a big achievement, whether it’s getting an A or playing a great game. But it’s also important to encourage your child along the journey. Finding success in small milestones teaches them to appreciate the process of learning. It also shows them that you recognize and appreciate their effort…not just their successes.
Avoid harsh words and negative statements, like calling your kids lazy. They aren’t motivators—they can have a big impact on your child’s self-esteem. Correcting them with patience and focusing on their strengths frequently will make them feel good, and encourage them to do good, too.
